Really.

I've noticed a few changes around the school...mostly due to my constant complaining and defiance. From my perspective, I shouldn't be bitching about adhering to the Handbook...heck, don't parents usually BREAK the rules?? Don't we generally spoil and allow our kids to have it their way?

In the recent weeks, I fought with Mikayla on some really STUPID issues. Her new teacher allows the kids to bring in toys, get up and walk around the classroom, and snack sharing. This was never allowed in any of Mikayla's previous classes and now I'm hollering at my kid over stupid shit.

One day, I get a homework assignment stating that my kid will get tested on her Halloween performance. WHAT?! TESTED?!?!!!! So, if my kid doesn't get 'it'...am I supposed to dropkick Miki from here to Timbuktu to get her to memorize the material!??

I stomped my way to school just to pick a bone. Honestly, I wasn't really THAT upset about the testing. I saw this as an opportunity to attack the issues that were igging the heck outta me. Might as well kill sixteen birds with one big boulder.

I confronted the principal (aka the cow) whether or not kindergarten children got tested in classrooms. Based on the homework assignment, my kid's academic career could potentially be in ruins if she doesn't figure out "Ten Little Pumpkins" by Halloween.

For the first time, the cow actually apologized and implied the misuse of the word. After explaining to me what the teacher's intents and purposes for well over 15 minutes, I abruptly cut her off to discuss other problems at hand with the school.

It took the teachers 2 years to get Mikayla to focus in class and now she's really losing it both at school and at home. Motivation is clearly lost and she makes numerous wise-ass excuses to avoid doing any homework. Previously, she was diligent enough to take the work right out of her bag, sit her cute butt on the chair, and start the assignment on her own.

Now? She heads straight to her prized dinosaur collection and pretends to be a Mommy Tyrannosaurus Rex chewing a Jurassic herbivore to bits. Screw addition and the alphabet.

When I complained about how the children bringing toys in, the retarded cow began to explaining away the psychological aspect in the children's behavior. Heck, I'm a mother and I know better than anyone else WHY they're bringing this crap in. I don't care why, just friggen stop the madness and stay in compliance with the handbook!

The farty cow shot me a blank look. She actually had the nerve to tell me that it isn't in the handbook. Excuse me? A document you regard second to the bible, you're now telling me this old-school rule no longer exists? Waitagoshdarnminute...since when did I start smoking dope?

I sarcastically proclaimed it was OKAY to bring toys and we, as parents, should all dump the school handbook. After all, we don't need to adhere to any policies and do whatever the heck we like. Ooooh! I can't wait to publicly make this announcement to the other parents about this!

Only thing that truly saddened me was how many trees from the Amazon forest had to be cut down to produce multiple copies of this now obsolete guide.

Idiot retracted and started to verbally go around in circles. Got her on this one.

After our the discussion, I found out from my daughter that the stupid cow marched into her classroom, scoured all of the cubbies and found toys galore. Dismayed at the notion of being wrong, she 'yelled' at the kindergarteners and declared how toys are NOT allowed in school.

Two up for me.

The thing is...this is the kind of shit I should NEVER have to complain about. As a parent, I should be bitching about other crap related to individual concerns rather than the class as a whole.

Round 3 coming up...Parent Teacher Conference next Friday.