I know I've been bad with blogging, but it's better that I keep quiet than to sound like a raving lunatic.

Having caught up with a great many things in the office and some in the home, I may be able to blog here and there. Not as frequently, but I'll make an effort. The only problem now is - I haven't blogged for so long that my writing's gotten wooden and rather obtuse. Hopefully, it'll pass!

Anyway, I have something hysterical to share. More Mikayla-isms, of course!

Mikayla LOVES ham sandwiches slathered with Hellman's mayonnaise. Unfortunately, the child has a hard time understanding that perishables are to be consumed within a week, not within a month. Whenever we have the appropriate stock at home, she doesn't feel like it. Whenever we don't, she'll request a sandwich to be made for tomorrow's snack time. Uh no, sorry kiddo. This, of course, is a frequent occurrence. Then again, being only 7, she doesn't have any concept of the time.

So...whilst in the shower, she asks me to prepare a sandwich for her. Aghast (because I'm in the shower), I told her the supplies had been completely depleted last week and NOW you want the damn sandwich?? I can't begin to tell you how SICK I am of eating the leftover crap she wasn't in the mood for!

Feeling disappointed, her head was down as she left the bathroom. With the bathroom door wide open, a blast of cold air gushed freezing my ass off. Gosh I hate being cold in the shower while my kid is asking for food. Don't laugh, this may happen to you one day.

A thought came to my mind, "hey, how about some prosciutto for snack tomorrow?"

Mikayla: "Ooooh!!! Good idea! I LOVE prosciutto!!!"

Me: "Okay, remind me tomorrow to pack it up for you or else I'll forget. I can't pack it right now, right?"

Mikayla: "Yeah, you can't pack it tonight. It'll go bad. How do I remind you?"

Me: "How about writing a note as a reminder?"

Mikayla: "A note?"

Me: "Yes, a note."

Mikayla: "Um mommy? I don't know how to spell prosciutto."

Me: "Just write Italian ham then."

Mikayla: "Oh okay."

She promptly leaves the makeshift sauna and supposedly writes me a note. Right before she headed off to bed (I was still in the shower), she explained the contents of the note, informed me where I could find the note, and babbled on some more.

Exasperated, I yelled: GET TO BED ALREADY!!!!!!!

Kid disappears in the speed of light.

So this morning...guess what I found?



Wow! It even comes with an illustration!

We purchased some pricey prosciutto at Whole Foods and the kid decides to draw the packaging just in case I gave her Oscar Meyer bologna instead.

Wise ass.